New Annotations!!!

There are new annotations to be found in the posts from 23/03/2010. These are the posts of the scanned Script, Thumbnails and Storyboards. Exciting reading to be had!!

Mood Board 2: Animation Stylings

OK So 2nd Mood Board. This one is more about the animation feel and style. As (I believe) I have mentioned before I am going for the 'Saturday Morning Hero' cartoons of the late 60's through to the early 80's. Obviously with Velvet Fist being primarly modelled on She-Hulk, the green amazon features heavily in this mood board. but there are appearances from several other series; He-Man and She-Ra, Super Friends and Thundarr to name a few. What I am wanting to take from these series is very much the design of the characters, though they are simplified, they are not at all stylised like many characters today and those of the 'cartooney' generation before them. These are the super powered heroes I grew up with, and so want to pay homage to them in my piece. Just pulling all these images together was very nostalgic and incredibly enjoyable. This is probably obvious given again I have gone to excess and given little thought to composition, and just wanted to cram in as many cool pics as possible. Hey it works for me, hopefully it gives everyone else an idea of what I'm after too.

Mood Board: Color Design

This is the colour mood board for Q MEN. May have gone overboard but it was fun finding so many images. As you can see I am going for a muted 1950's aesthetic. I want the piece to look like film stoke form the 50's so whilst there is a huge range of colours, the contrast and vibrance of those colours was muted at the time, and has degraded further over the passage of time. There will be mood boards to follow for Animation Style/ Design, and maybe 'Tone' (as in humour style) and production design for the appartment, and props etc.

Story Boards

Here are my horrible storyboards. I hate doing storyboards. Hate it. I love bringing the story from the script into images, it's just that storyboards constantly bring to the fore my lack of drawing ability. This flows on to sap my enthusiasm for the remainder of the piece, given that there is a LOT of drawing to be done. Anyway suck it up stop whining and move on.

These are at least a great improvement from the flat boring thumbnails. Still certainly quite flat during the animated sequence but as I believe I've mentioned before I'm going for the 80's saturday morning cartoon 'talking heads' thing where there was lots of exposition, bad lip synching and reaction shots to minimize lip sync, and props to hide lips to hide lip sync. Lip sync. Lip sync. N*sync. So as a result I'm happy for the apartment scene to be a deliberately flat and boring, hopefully the audience will be able to get on board with the humour. Screw 'em if they don't. I don't owe 'em nuthin, I can always work at the bank again.

There is no timing on these yet, that is 'cos I'm still not sure of it yet. I'll be going over that over this week and will add the timing, I may alter some of the compositions and sequences also, but not sure yet.

Script (finali-ish draft)

Copy of the script. This shouldn't change to much. This was certainly the most enjoyable part for me given that I was able to make changes and tweak things as I saw fit. This is opposed to the story boards and character designs where I am constantly unhappy with what I produce but simply do not have the drawing ability to make what's in my head appear on the paper. The same goes for when I am producing the animation then I am dealing with not only my horrible drawings but also wrestling with software that my analogue brain can not quite comprehend let alone use.

I am worried that this is too long, as usual I struggle to make my point in a succinct manner. I am pinning my hopes on the fact that at least half of this is not animated as such and is actually comic panels; i.e just one still image.

I'm not worried, but interested, to see if the audience gets on the waive-length of the humour I'm going for. It really is pitched at super-hero nerds, so animation is certainly the correct medium for that, but given the ambiguous gender of the two characters (Velvet Fist will sound like a drag queen, Hermaphroditie a 35 year old woman) and the gay themes involved it may be too many things at once and simply be a mess. If so lesson learned. If not, success and stardom beckons. Win/ win.

Thumbnails

Just to give these a little context these were the first pass thumbnails for story boards. The introduction panels are EXTREMELY flat and boring so have since tried to make them a little more dynamic and interesting. Was also conscious at this point of creating as few as possible backgrounds for the animation itself. At this stage point I think there were 6 or 7 now there are 5 which is better, and tidier.

Character Designs

waiting on character designs from Yen. I have done my design, but am wanting him to do the final drawings that I will then use, his style and skill is better than what I can come up with. Still waiting....

Scripts, Scripts, Scripts

Have written 5 scripts (including mine) for the other class members. This has been most enjoyable, especially those that I also created much of the story along with the dialogue etc. I unfortunately made most of them 2-3 pages so need to learn to be more efficient in showing character and story as obviously still need to create to many elements to get accross the intended message. Given these were all done in primarlily one draft though, should be able to tighten them up over time. My own script has been complete for a while, but need to punch up the ending. It is meant to be a little bit of a fizzer anyway, like an epilogue to an episode of said 80's cartoons, so kind of not a real 'joke' but more of a character 'joke' like Calvin and Hobbes etc, but still prob want a bit more punch.

Mood Boards

have started collecting some images and colour pallettes for the mood board.

Story Boards

Story boards have been completed. Tried to ensure there was as few backgrounds as possible to minimise work volume. After the original thumbnails where everything was flat, the new boards have a little more interest. Given the piece is a pastiche/ parody of 80's cartoons, the fact that it is not overly dynamic is ok, I hope. Will scan these in tonight.

OPENING SEQUENCE

Have thumb-nailed the opening sequence (the part with the comic book panels) and it is snoresville. So have tried to come up with some more interesting layouts, cos EVERYTHING was a flat front on shot. Have got some better ideas already and will get Steve to help me compose the frames to make the whole thing a bit more dynamic and engaging.

Darren also pointed out in one of the programs I'll be able to do the panels in layers and move within the panel itself and then on to the next on in 3D space. This will be similar to the Spider-man 3 opening (probably all of them actually but I can't remember) where we move from 2d panel to panel in a 3D spider-web. That should also ad far more interest in the sequence.

SCRIPTS!!!

I have finished my script, as mentioned before. It is too long, but then what else is new? Writing the script was great and as a result I have been shopping my services around to everyone else to write their scripts. As of now I have written both Ryan's and Yen's. It was great being able to interpret their stories and incorporate some character elements and arcs that I felt were appropriate. Yen is yet to see the draft I have done. Ryan is happy with the final product I produced for him. Chris has also asked to have a chat re me helping out on his script. It's great to be able to help out at this point, knowing I'll be of much less use to everyone once the production starts in earnest.

HERMAPHRODITIE

Hermaphroditie finally has face and a body. Relatively comfortable with the the elements, but just as with Velvet Fist, will look forward to some evolution before having to animate them. I have however given the two designs to yen and requested his interpretation of them. I think he will offer a cleaner design than I have produced and I can continue on with his designs.

APARTMENT

Have moved on from original idea of having the apratment look like the commission housing apartment block in Rathdowne St, and gone for something a little more eastern block/ghetto. have found a good reference pic where there is a graffititied concrete wall with barb wire and a derelict building in background. I like the idea that this shows they heroes not only live in a poor area, but in a segregated area, reminiscent of apartheid. Wow deep.

Need some more work on the interior design and furnishing of the apartment. Will be pretty sparce, they are poor after all, but still need enough to make it visually interesting and look like a real living space.

HERMAPHRODITIE (and character deisgn talk)

Hermaphroditie has again taken a back seat to other work i.e. the script and thumbnails. Cara wanted to do a design and she did a good job, will be able to integrate some of her ideas into the final design.

Still not entirely happy with Velvet Fist. But that is as much because I'm never happy with my drawing abilities. Have a desin that is representitive of what was in my head, but every drawing I see of a She-Hulk-ish character by an artist with talent makes me hate my design. Will have to deal with it, let it go, relax and move on.

THUMBNAILS

Have completed first version of thumbnails. REALLY boring layouts for initial comic panel/ opening credits. Will have to head back to the drawing board and come up with some more interesting angles and ideas.

The animated section fared a little better. Am comfortable with finding a few different ways of hiding mouth to avoid lip sync, am just concerned is a little bit repetitive and boring. I like the master shot of the appartment, some of the others are only ok though. They are hardly inspired designs... will watch more crap old super hero-ish cartoons and old comic books to get some more layout ideas.

SCRIPT

Have completed 2nd draft of script, this time done in proper layout thanks to Cltex. Still really worried is way too long, as I become even more familiar with the story, maybe I'll find ways of communicating the points in a more efficient manner. Although, knowing me, probably not. At the moment it's about 2 1/2 to 2 2/3 pages long, this however includes the opening credits. Also at least on page is based on one still image or a sequence of still images (drawn to look like vintage comic book panels) so that should reduce the work load.

THE APPARTMENT

Finding it hard to get good ref for the appartment, both exterior and interior. Had imagined the exterior as looking like the commission appartments on Rathdowne St, but perhaps the style of the interior is more New York-ish and, given all Heroes inhabit New York or a New York pseudonym (Gotham, Metropolis) should perhaps make the exterior follow this stereotype. But I know the layout of the room (it's very bare, they're like starving dero Uni students so no furnishings) so will keep working on that, and building/ furnishing as I get comfortable with all the details.

HERMAPHRODITIE

Hermaphroditie design WAY behind schedule! Have some good ref pics though of his/her face from P!nk, Robyn and some other androgynous chicks. Also some good ref drawings of Hank and Dean Venture, Tinkerbell and Xandir to get some design ideas for boyish features and body. Style has been consolidated by Velvet Fist design, so won't take as long as 'her'.

VELVET FIST DESIGN

Velvet Fist design, almost finalised images to follow. Body ref from Serena Williams, face and attitude from Fran Fine (the Nanny). Also found some good ref drawings of She-Hulk, Wonder Woman and Power Girl that have been useful for how to stylise physique and face/hair details.

Q Men Script Draft #2

Intro
As the following voice over reads, comic strip panels move past, illustrating the narrative.

NARRATOR

"The gay gene has been found. In an attempt to rid the world of this scourge, scientists found a way to virally mutate the gene, turning all pink bloods into true blue red blooded citizens. But a lab accident sent an unstable strain of the virus into the atmosphere gifting the queers with extraordinary powers, leading them to become the next stage in human evolution: superior-homo! War now rages between the two species, leaving our only hope for salvation to a small but well drilled group of mutants: The Q Men."

FADE IN

EXT APARTMENT BLOCK

A derelict and drab apartment building stretches into the sky surrounded by wild unkempt garden beds a completely broken down playground and basket ball court where both goal rings are in a state of disrepair.

INT APARTMENT

Inside one of the apartments. Every-bit as uninspiring as the exterior; water damage highlights every wall. The central heating unit looks like a relic from early last century and the thread bare carpets are probably only held together by thriving dust mite colonies.

HERMAPHRODITIE sits slouched on a couch that a hobo would be ashamed of, watching an old TV with a coat hanger for an antenna.

The door suddenly slams open with unnatural force and VELVET FIST, a 7' tall blue giant with flaming red hair walks in, her canary yellow 'baby doll' costume smeared with blood.

VELVET FIST

Oh I tell you, I am so sick of mortal henchmen...
The screen freezes framing Velvet Fist and immediately transforms into a comic strip panel with her name in the corner.

NARRATOR

Velvet Fist. Seven feet of royal blue power.
Superhuman strength and dress sense.
Smith and Western for long range combat, and 'cos
it looks SUPER hot.
The freeze frame cedes to the animation

VELVET FIST (cont)

...One punch and they explode like a water balloon.

HERMAPHRODITIE

They really should be more considerate in their final moments.
The screen again freezes to a comic panel, this time on Hermaphroditie.

NARRATOR
Hermaphroditie. A changling. Hermaphroditie
can take on the the appearance and
characteristics of any person or creature.
An intersex in the purest sense, Hermaphroditie
is neither male nor female, rendering pronouns obsolete.

The panel once again gives way to the animation

VELVET FIST

For someone who can become
anyone you certainly lack empathy of any kind.

HERMAPHRODITIE

So in that scenario of the henchmen water balloon
I'm supposed to empathise with the pin?

VELVET FIST

Oh please. You give more thought to how
many squares of toilet paper to use than killing henchmen.

HERMAPHRODITIE

Classy

VELVET FIST

You know what I mean. Blood is so hard to get out
of my costume, I only have two of these things to rotate.
Image is important you know, especially if we want to break
into the more prestigious teams.

HERMAPHRODITIE

Your obsession with appearance is a weakness.
Just as I have transcended gender,
I have transcended your archaic notions of clothing.

VELVET FIST

Transcended nothing. You just like walking around naked.

HERMAPHRODITIE

No nipple. No naked.

VELVET FIST (provocatively)

Although you certainly have managed to transcend vanity
HERMAPHRODITIE (trying to hide shock and hurt feelings)
Yes, well, it's another subjective, restrictive concept

VELVET FIST

I think it's noble, given your abilities, that you don't make yourself prettier...
or more handsome, whatever it is you do.

HERMAPHRODITIE

My self worth is not validated by someone deeming
my appearance as beautiful.

VELVET FIST

And good for you! So are we still going clubbing tonight?
HERMAPHRODITIE

Sure.

Velvet Fist exits the room

VELVET FIST (OS)

And will you be going as Brad or Angelina then?

HERMAPHRODITIE

I do that to maintain my secret identity!

VELVET FIST (OS)

Of course you do. I just have to chuck my archaic notions in the laundry.

END CREDITS

Treatment: Q Men

WORLD:

An alternate 1950's universe. Fashion, language, and design are all reminiscent of 1950's Aus/ USA. Same goes for the societies' very conservative views. People are defined and critically judged by their appearance and their adherence to the expected behaviours.

Like Batman TAS the universe has the design principals of a bygone era, but has technology equal and at times superior to ours, however with a naive and impractical application, i.e a 1950's view of future technology.

CHARACTERS:

VELVET FIST

Velvet Fist is a She-Hulk analogue. She is 7 feet tall with royal blue skin and flaming red hair, lips and finger nails. It is unknown if she is a huge woman or a man in drag, as she also sounds like an effeminate male and is overly deliberate in her feminine mannerisms.

She is hyper-female in appearance, always dressed in the most provocative and sexualised outfits. Her costume when in Super Hero mode is a canary yellow baby-doll teddy, coupled with impossibly high-heeled boots. She also carries a large 6 shooter on a garter on her right leg for long range combat, and changeling because of the phallic associations.

She can be bitchy like any self respecting drag queen and despite her superficial nature and cheer leader intonation and vocabulary, can be quite intelligent, manipulative and skilled at pushing people's buttons. She is also very proud of her appearance, liking to show of her body, and being desired by all, she is a complete exhibitionist.

HERMAPHRODITIE

Hermaphroditie is a changeling. Able to take on the form of any person or creature. She is a true hermaphrodite in that she is neither male nor female (referred to as 'she' for ease of communication and because she will be voiced by a female). In her unaltered state she is approximately 5'' 8' with blond hair and fair skin. She has an appearance of a 16 year old boy, but with the voice of a woman in her 30's. As her powers allow her to morph into anyone, including generating their clothes she has no need to wear clothes herself. In her un-morphed form she is naked, however with no nipples or genitals.

She is a spiky personality, very anti-establishment. She believes herself to be the have the purest view of the world because she is not bound by institutions such as gender and clothing. Her pride in her insight however lead her to being very blinkered and closed minded to any view other than her own.

She is blunt in her communication, happy to be very confrontational in any interaction with anyone, pulling them up on any opinions she believes to be ignorant or oppressive. Her views of oppression are easily inflamed by anything from language ("patriarchal in origin!") to architecture ("phallic manifestations!").


STORY

The opening narrative is read in the style of a 1950's newsreel. As the narrator reads we scan over comic panels illustrating his story. The line "...next stage of evolution superior-homo" is illustrated by the Darwinian image of apes through to man, with a new final stage of an overtly camp male, back arched, winking in a comely fashion to the viewer.

After the introduction with the narration and the comic panels the animation begins with an establishing shot of a derelict apartment building in a run down area. The apartment building is tall with hundreds of tiny windows, the rooms will obviously be small and the windows will let in minimal light. The building is surrounded by wild and unkempt gardens, overgrown and predominantly weeds. There is a broken down playground, the equipment unused for years and is various states of complete disrepair. A basketball court, bitumen broken into small islands separated by small estuaries of wild grass can also be seen, has its two rings bent towards the ground, old men now weak to fulfil their duties.

Inside an apartment it is as depressing as the exterior. Faded green walls are decorated with the sickly brown trails of water damage, the stained carpet appears a fertile ground for indoor mushrooms. HERMAPHRODITIE sits on weary couch that is hemorrhaging its stuffing. She is slouched watching a old TV, with a coat hanger for an antenna.
The door slams open with unnatural force revealing VELVET FIST, her bright yellow costume stained with large smears of blood. She complains about the lack of mortal henchmen's ability to handle a punch from a super powered being without spraying their insides. She receives no sympathy from Hermaphroditie. Velvet Fist persists with her point that it is hard for a struggling Super Hero to maintain costumes etc when they are constantly being stained and wrecked by henchmen entrails.
Hermaphroditie chastises Velvet Fist for her adherence to manufactured institutions such as 'clothing' 'gender', indirectly praising herself for her ability to transcend such trifling matters.
Velvet Fist uses her piousness against her by praising Hermaphroditie for her commitment to ignoring vanity, and not making herself more attractive, given her powers make that an easy option. Forced to maintain the course she had plotted herself Hermaphroditie acknowledges she does not feel the need to gain external validation for her appearance, even though she has clearly been hurt by Velvet Fists insinuation that she is not attractive.
Velvet Fist congratulates Hermaphraditie again on her intrinsic self worth as she asks if she will both be joining her that night at the clubs, Hermaphroditie says she will. Velvet Fist then pointedly asks if she will be attending as 'Brad' or 'Angelina', acknowledging that her digs at Hermaphroditie's appearance were meant to be an attack. Still trying to maintain that she is not beholden to such trivial notions of being judged on appearance Hermaphroditie cries that her attendance of clubs incognito is to maintain her secret identity. Given she will be hanging out with the only 7'' tall, blue skinned red head in the city, Velvet Fist is not convinced.

CONCEPT/ CONTROLLING IDEAS
To show highlight how archaic the notion is to judge someone by their appearance, and yet how someone looks will likely define their character.
To have some witty dialogue and repartee
Visually take the piss out of Super Hero and limited animation series of the 50's/60's

Challenge notions of gender and the expected characteristics associated with each.